And with that in mind, I finally received an email the other day from the orphanage that told me to email the Adoption Unit in the Hong Kong Government. Check. Sitting and waiting for their reply now... Check.
Waiting is hard. I am such a hands-on person that the suspense is eating at me. On the outside I am calm. I have left it to God. Yep, that's right. It's in God's hands…
But what about...
Maybe I should have…
What if…
The questions that swirl in my head are crazy. I feel as though I am living on autopilot. Checking my email in-between hanging out washing and playing with bebe-girl. Then check it again before I leave the house to go get groceries. Check it again when I'm in the supermarket carpark. I am almost willing an answer to come just by my persistence.
Possibility is a weird word.
pos·si·bil·i·ty
noun \ˌpä-sə-ˈbi-lə-tē
: a chance that something might exist, happen, or be true : the state or fact of being possible
: something that might be done or might happen : something that is possible
The fact that even the Merriam-Webster dictionary definition can't really explain the word well cracks me up. The idea that anything could happen freaks me out. Good or bad or possibly no news could be waiting for me.
In the meantime, I carry on with life as I have always known it. The expectation that someday answers will unfold and another side of this story can be told. I am hoping for good news but at the same time I fear that it may not be.
